Show Me Your Muscles

Sequence

Upon further examination of the photos I took of Kellyn yesterday, I realized that in spite of the circumstances the photos were pretty adorable:

The pose that inspired me to pull out the camera.

She opened her eyes when the camera flashed.

Gripping the chair tightly and possibly still annoyed with mommy.

Don't worry.  I picked her up as soon as I took the last photo and we had some quiet time rocking in the chair together.

Vocabulary

We have had a vocabulary explosion around our house within the last three weeks.  Aric decided that it was time to start talking and we're doing our best to listen and understand.  Here is some of what Aric is saying right now:

He-doh  or doh..................Here you go
nuk....................................milk, water or look
dak-ooo.............................thank you
del-come...........................you're welcome
weese................................please
oh man, uh-oh, oh-no.......(self-explanatory)
kuck.................................cup
dis....................................this
hot....................................hot
no.....................................no
mine.................................mine
dada, daddy.....................daddy
mama...............................mama
nax..................................snacks
bebee...............................baby, Kellyn or belly (depending on the context)
shoos...............................shoes
mouf.................................mouth
nuffing.............................nothing
noss..................................nose
eyess................................eye
miss.................................kiss
dot...................................dog
dee...................................kitty

Sabotage and Other Tidbits

After discovering that our new treadmill is not working (it thinks it's working but the treadmill belt won't move an inch), I called NordicTrack to get it fixed.  They ordered a new motor for the treadmill, but the motor is backordered until mid-March.  I am convinced Ryan arranged this to sabotage me winning our fitness challenge.

While spending time this morning baking banana bread, doing laundry, calling NordicTrack, talking to my mom, dealing with a naughty 20 month old and planning menu ideas, I seemed to have neglected someone a bit:

She fell asleep like this in her bouncy chair.  What a precious little girl.  I never get bored looking at her.

While I was busy, Aric entertained himself by reading, playing and making a mess of the house, typical toddler activities.

Finally, yesterday I came home to find a package waiting for me.  I was confused when I realized I mailed this package seven years ago to a friend as a birthday gift.  It was returned as unable to forward.  Too bad I no longer stay in touch with that person and I am unable to use the item since it's a maternity shirt.

Four Months

It's hard to believe Kellyn is already four months old and yet it somehow seems so long ago since she was born.  She is developing such a little personality- she's a talker!  After having such a quiet baby in Aric, it's a new experience to have a very vocal baby.  Kellyn coos, squeals, shrieks and babbles at us all of the time.  In addition to the noise, she's rolling over from back to belly and getting quite upset when she gets "stuck".  Aric is all too eager to provide assistance and roll her back over no matter what position she's in.  Last week we moved Kellyn from the bassinet in our room to the crib in Aric's room.  It takes a coordinated effort to get them both down for the night in the same room, but it's so much better to have her in another room.  I don't hear her until she actually wakes up and cries vs automatically picking her up as soon as she made the slightest noise in our room.  We made the decision to finally move her out of our room after a week straight of her waking up 4-5 times a night, and realizing that she probably wasn't waking up during all of those times.  We've also begun to put Kellyn in the jumperoo.  Her favorite pastime in the jumperoo is to spin the wheels and suck on the seat.  Soon enough she'll be tall enough and will figure out the joy of jumping. 

Here are some recent photos of our sweet girl:

Hello, My Name is Aric...

...and I like it when Mommy lets me pick out my own clothes.  My camouflage pants are my favorite.

...Because everything goes with camouflage, of course!

Just Leave Me Alone

I've been feeling claustrophobic lately. The only way I can describe what I feel is by likening it to a feeling I had during my c-section with Kellyn. While the OB was working on me after I had delivered Kellyn, I felt him tugging and pulling on my body. At one point I wanted to yell out, "Just leave me alone", but I knew that I couldn't because the last step of surgery was to stitch me closed.  I had to lay there on the table and wait patiently, ignoring the part of me that wanted to be left alone.

That thought, "Just leave me alone", has randomly crossed my mind since that time. The frequency of that feeling has begun to increase, though.  Early this morning while I was nursing Kellyn I was struck by that thought.  I just wanted to go back to sleep and not be bothered by a hungry child.  Don't get me wrong, she is not neglected in any way, I'm just not always thrilled to drag myself out of bed at 1am and deal with her for the next 40 minutes.  The feeling returned while I was at work today. I don't think of work as a respite from taking care of people.  It brings me more "kids" to take care of who just whine in a completely different way than my own. 

I try to be there for Ryan and the kids and sometimes it's to the detriment of myself. I feel so guilty when I take time for myself, though, and it's going to take some awhile to get past that feeling.  When I do get time to myself I often find myself running errands, doing chores or even taking a kid along with me instead of pampering myself, reading a book or just having a moment of solitude without worrying about anyone else.

These episodes, if you will, are making me realize how unhealthy it is to neglect myself.  I need to take an active interest in my mental and physical health.  Once I do, then maybe I can be a better wife and mother and quit visiting this topic over and over.

Nuffing

The other night as I'm sitting in the family room on the computer and Aric is down the hall doing who knows what in his room, I hear a loud crash.  I get up and walk down the hall to see what on earth he is up to. 

Aric is standing in the corner of his room by his nightstand looking down at the floor where his aquarium light is now lying.

"Aric, what are you doing?"

Aric pulls his arms in to his chest, turns towards me with a horrified look on his face and in a small voice says, "Nuffing".

All I could do was walk away laughing.

The Rest of the Battle

In all fairness, I think Aric was the one to throw the first punch.  The penguins were just defending themselves...

Battle

It took a united effort but it seems the penguins (and armadillo) won the battle:

Waste of Time

I went to my body composition test yesterday.  It brought me really close to a man with calipers.  For the life of me I can't remember his name.  I'd rather not be that close to anyone with calipers again.  In addition, I had the worst time taking directions because I was exhausted after watching three crabby children during the day.  He probably thought I was stupid.  The result of my test: my BMI is on the low end and he recommends that I not lose any weight.  Then he talked up their personal trainers and recommended that I get one.  I'm not getting one.

Now I'm back to square one.  The body composition test was no help with my fitness challenge.  I'm looking into some other options to use as a gauge in my fitness progress.
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If you want to use the shoe idea, please do and don't worry about giving me credit.  I thought it would be a fun idea after viewing some family photos on another blog that included a photo of just their legs and feet.  It's not even an accurate photo since Kellyn's feet are still too small to fit into her shoes.  That girl has some tiny feet!

The Shoes

I was tired of trying to capture the "perfect" photo for my header and decided our shoes would be more cooperative. 

They were very patient with me out in the cold and didn't voice one complaint about being snowed on.

Fitness Challenge

Four years ago I was in amazing physical shape.  Five days a week before work I went to the gym to run and lift weights.  I felt good about myself and the body I achieved through my hard work.  Around that time I quit working out.  Flash forward four years and two babies later and I still feel good about myself even though I don't work out.  I didn't always feel that way.

After I had Aric, I was thrilled with my new baby, my new status as a mommy and not so thrilled with the way pregnancy had changed my body.  I had gone from having a girlish figure with a flat stomach to a womanly figure and that flat stomach had vanished completely from sight.  I was horrified with what I had left after pregnancy, but was unmotivated to change it.  I struggled with huge feelings of guilt if I did anything that kept me from spending time with Aric to include working out.  I work full time, after all, and that alone carries with it guilt and baggage.  In the midst of my struggles, I found out Kellyn was on her way and there was no need to get in shape.  My pregnancy with her was difficult and being on modified bed rest made me a sedentary creature.

After eighteen months of pregnancy and two kids, my body definitely shows the signs of bearing children.  And I'm okay with that.  I won't ever go back to having that girlish figure.  There are clothes in my closet that I may never fit into again.  I have stretch marks, wider hips, a gently curving belly and for the first time in my life I don't mind it.  I know my husband still loves me and I have two beautiful children who have changed me forever.

With that being said, I am not implying that I do not have a desire to work out, get back in shape and look my best.  With a full time job, two kids and a huge lack of sleep, it will be a challenge to get into a routine but I have an incentive.  Ryan proposed that we have a fitness challenge as an incentive for both of us to get into shape.  We each have specific fitness goals that we would like to achieve and a need to go on a fun vacation.  The winner of the challenge, which ends on Kellyn's first birthday, will get to decide where our vacation destination is.  I have an appointment this week to have a body composition test done.  In case you were wondering, I'm not looking forward to hearing what my BMI is or how out of shape I actually am.  However, I think this appointment will help me find out what a realistic fitness goal for me is and just maybe I'll be able to win the challenge.

Wish me luck!

Precocious

Kellyn has been acting differently for the past week.  Fussier, wants to be held more, won't eat as much, but when she does eat she cluster feeds, chewing on everything she can get her mouth onto, waking up more overnight, etc.  We looked in her mouth, didn't see anything of interest and have blamed her behavior on a phase she was going through or that maybe she was just sick.

Yesterday when I picked her up, the sitter asked me if she was teething and mentioned seeing a glimpse of white on the bottom gum line.  Sure enough, there is a little bit of white coming through.  She's 3-1/2 months old!!  I went to town after dinner and traipsed all over looking for a teething pacifier or anything she might be able to use.  Kellyn has not come close to mastering her fine motor skills to pick up an object, hold onto said object and hold it in her mouth.  Even the Baby Orajel makers think she's too young.  Their minimum age of use is 4 months old.  I'll be contacting the doctor today to find out what I can give her.

I guess she's just taking after her mother...