A Small Glimpse Into Our Lives

Baffled

2012-02-17T08:05:00.002-06:00

I really enjoy watching my children creatively play. It makes me smile as I realize they are cultivating their imaginations. Sometimes, though, I do a double take:

I noticed the dinosaurs lined up in front of Kellyn's Valentine's card.

When I asked Kellyn what they were doing she said they were talking to the monkey.

Of course they are, how silly of me that I had to ask.

Those same dinosaurs were lined up in rows later and became Aric's math project. On his own volition he was doing subtraction problems, "If you have four stegosaurus and take away one how many are left." I didn't realize so much fun could be had with a bag of $1 Valentine clearance dinosaurs. (How are plastic dinosaurs a Valentine's item?)

Last night I went into Aric's room to put clothes away and came upon this scene:

When I asked him why the cars were in a circle and got past the "because they are" answer he said they wanted to see their friends. It might just be me, but I don't think that looks friendly. I'd be intimidated if I were one of the three cars in the middle.

Then this morning I happened upon this scene:

Why does Belle have a tiger in her lap? Why is she encircled by dinosaurs? I thought those questions, but thought better of asking them aloud.

The mind of a preschooler baffles me.

Things Heard Around Here

2012-02-15T05:24:00.001-06:00

Aric made the best duck ever.

Translation:
Kellyn had trouble putting together a duck puzzle and Aric offered his assistance. After he finished the puzzle (which was only five or six pieces), Kellyn came into the kitchen to tell me her puzzle was finished.

Pictures from My Phone

2012-02-14T07:21:00.000-06:00

The kids had fun sledding yesterday. We weren't out for very long, because the snow was heavy, wet and still snowing when we were out there. Kellyn did not like going down by herself. These photos were the only photos I took right after their first run. Kellyn was actually crying while Aric was dusting himself off and asking if he could do it again. The subsequent trips down I went with Kellyn in my lap. She preferred the feeling of security that only an adult could provide without realizing that I had no control over that saucer and we almost ended up in that barbed wire fence at the bottom a couple of times. It's too bad the snow will probably melt away today. At least they experienced real sledding this winter.

Kellyn is definitely a girl. She has begun to realize there are things called hair accessories. She won't keep any of them in her hair for an extended period of time, but she frequently wants me to put something in her hair.

Last night she was admiring herself in the bathroom mirror:

Never one to be left out, Aric wanted his picture taken too. He is growing up way too fast!

Finally

2012-02-13T07:12:00.000-06:00

We'll be taking a break today from our normal activities because it finally snowed last night. It's not much but it will work just fine for our purposes. We have waited all winter for that to happen, especially since the kids were given snow saucers for Christmas. This morning I finally unpacked them and showed them to the kids. They are pretty excited about our after breakfast plans.

I am excited for them, but less excited about our after breakfast plans. I know who will be hauling the kids and the saucers back up the hill.

Letting Go

2012-02-10T07:17:00.000-06:00

When I make gifts for people or items for my shop I tend to be rather hard on myself if there are any flaws in the item. I have really noticed this since I opened my shop and people began buying things. Anytime I mailed something out I was nervous or had feelings of dread, hoping and praying that the recipient would like what they purchased. It was awful and I had a terrible weight hanging on my shoulders. The funny thing is that even when people responded positively to what they received I still had feelings of dread the next time.

Last week I read part of an interview on an Etsy blog and it freed me from being so hard on myself.

What does handmade mean to you?
Handmade means fun, creative, imperfect and created with love. There’s beauty in the imperfections. None of our cards are exactly the same. It’s so cheap, easy and fast to print digitally these days that we’re seeing a real resurgence in the artisan art community and an appreciation for the handmade process. The end product is often more tactile and personal. We think people respond to that, and there’s a connection made between the crafter and the recipient.

It made me realize that the people who were buying my things wanted something handmade. If they didn't want a handmade item they would go to the nearest store and buy something with perfect stitches that a machine made. That weight lifted off of my shoulders after reading that excerpt.

I am not saying that I have now freed myself to sloppily make things. I still work hard to make things look nice. That article allowed me to quit being so hard on myself, which is what I truly needed. Sometimes no matter how hard I try or how many stitches I rip out and re-sew what I have made will never look perfect and that is okay.

Here is a peek at some of the things I have worked on in the past few weeks:

Valentine's themed diaper covers for a photo shoot.

This was a sample pillow case to see how it was made.

Pillow case #1 for a daycare.

Pillow case #2 for a daycare.

ID Holder without the wrist strap.

Pillow. It is not quite finished, I ran out of stuffing.

My stock. My sweet husband added shelves to a downstairs closet near my work area. That way I can keep my merchandise protected while it is waiting to go to a new home.

This is usually what my work area looks like when I'm mid project.

Dear Ryan

2012-02-09T06:41:00.000-06:00

Dear Ryan,

Today is your 36th birthday. Time seems to go by much faster in adulthood, a little too fast. I decided that I'll be 32 for awhile. It seems like a good age. I keep telling people I'll be 32 until I look 32 and then I'll move on to a different age. The truth, well the truth is I can't face 34. I know that is a year away but I thought about it and 33 didn't have the quite the same ring to me. If I'm going to be the same age for awhile I should like the sound of it, right? Because of you I'm going to be 32 until I reach 35 and then I'll be my age again. You would've laughed, but understood.

This year I knitted scarves for Rudy and Dad for their birthdays. Rudy requested a manly scarf and kept dropping big hints on how nice it would be to have a knitted scarf. I'm not sure he realized I might actually take him up on his request. I taught myself through YouTube videos how to knit. (It's amazing the kinds of teaching videos people post. I'm not sure why they do it, but I was very thankful that someone did post the video.) It was hard finishing the last scarf and not starting on yours next.

I found some t-shirts you would've liked. I smile thinking how much you would have enjoyed getting one for your birthday along with your scarf.

I remember the conversations we had about how unfair it was that they suddenly decided Pluto wasn't a planet.

Didn't you push Rudy into the street to "save" him from a spider?

So very true. Some days when I miss you I buy a Carmel Macchiato and think of you.

You were the King of procrastination. You had it down to a fine art.

Today Laura is going to come spend the day with me. We're going to run errands, play with the kids, and I'll be thinking of you. I have a bottle of your favorite wine to toast you with:

You would have gotten a huge kick out of how I obtained that wine for everyone. Last summer when we were in Chicago I took the kids and drove to Monticello, IN for a liquor run. That sales woman must have thought it was crazy that I bought three cases of Black Beauty wine, either that or I must have made her day because her sales stats looked pretty good. I can see why you liked the place. I might have stayed longer and poked around except it was raining cats and dogs and I had Aric and Kellyn who were a bit too fascinated with everything in the winery. I spent the rest of the summer hauling wine around on our trips and delivering the cases. We all have enough wine now to toast you for six years until someone needs to make another liquor run for more. I call "not it"!

I think about you all of the time. You were so loved and cherished and we all miss you terribly. Kiss my babies and keep building those sand castles.

Happy Birthday, Ryan.

Things Heard Around Here

2012-02-07T05:58:00.000-06:00

That's Kellyn. She's my friend. I'm her brother and she's my big girl. And I can hug her all the time.

Translation:
It's good to hear them being nice to each other every once in awhile instead of fighting and arguing, which is usually the norm. Although, I'm sure being hugged all of the time would cause some sort of argument to ensue.

To My Dad...

2012-02-07T00:00:00.001-06:00

Happy Birthday. I love you.

Kellyn's Favorite Hang Out

2012-02-06T05:40:00.000-06:00

One of Kellyn's favorite toys to play with is the kitchen:

It seems fitting that my daughter enjoys it, because I played with that kitchen all of the time while growing up. It holds some very special memories for me.

Except I don't recall using it in quite the same way that Kellyn does:

Kellyn empties the kitchen, pulls the sink out and climbs inside, closing the door behind her. Sometimes she sits in there singing and talking to herself.

Other times she acts goofy, repeatedly popping her head up, trying to get attention.

Regardless, I'm happy that it brings her so much joy, even if it is not quite in the same way as I enjoyed it.

My Week in Photos

2012-02-03T07:36:00.002-06:00

It has been a rough week around here. It started Monday with Kellyn getting sick and slowly went down hill. By today, Kellyn is on the mend, Aric broke his fever, and Ryan and I have been up since 2am with bad congestion and a three year old snoring in our bed.

Here are some photos from my phone that were taken over the week:

We began teaching Aric to spell and write words. This week he learned: mommy, daddy, bird, pig, dog and cat.

I managed to get some sewing done and added more wristlets to my Etsy store.

Even while sick, Kellyn is mischievous.

I caught her sticking little animals into the cords on the blinds.

Good thing the blinds are sturdy, thus far.

The living room looked like this most of the week. Daddy had to work late all week and Mommy was too tired to keep up.

Aric was hit by the bug and wiped out.

The usual conditions I find myself in while sewing.

I thought my sewing area was bad until I turned around and saw this:

This work of art was done last night single- handedly by Kellyn, who was obviously on the mend. Aric was playing his racing game while this happened. I had been sewing and Daddy was stuck at work.

And those are the reasons I haven't kept up with my blog all week.

To My Brother...

2012-02-02T13:52:00.000-06:00

Happy Birthday to my brother who is now officially an antique. You make me feel old!

Things Heard Around Here

2012-01-30T19:20:00.000-06:00

Mommy, can I play Angry Birds?

Translation:
My new phone and Ryan's new kindle keep getting commandeered by our children who now have an addiction to Angry Birds.

Our Money's Worth

2012-01-27T06:19:00.000-06:00

We definitely feel we have gotten our money's worth out of our floating shelves. We thought we did pretty well when we spent $40 on seven shelves, but Ryan kept going. He had one last piece of door left. He used it to make a long matching shelf on the other accent wall in our basement. The shelves we had up there before were left by the previous homeowner and not really our first choice of shelves.

Ryan took those shelves down and installed them in my sweat shop.

They work for what I need them for and I plan on painting them this spring.

The new shelf is cleaner, more streamlined and matches the other shelves we made. We're quite happy with the results.

The only thing we aren't happy with is the new shelf is making us rethink what we need to make the wall look cohesive. The picture on that wall just doesn't seem to work anymore. I guess that's a project for another day.

Rearranging

2012-01-25T08:11:00.000-06:00

A couple of weeks ago Ryan came home with a closet shelf. I'm a closet slob or at least I was, but I'm trying to be better. Ryan, the good husband that he is, decided he would help me out and provide more organization in my life. He also provided me with a good reason to sort through the clothes and junk that were in my closet. I must say, believe it or not, that my closet looks much better than it did before:

After I finished cleaning out and organizing my closet, Ryan decided to rearrange the furniture in our bedroom. Our bed is huge and because I was getting up multiple times during the night with the kids I repeatedly ran into the foot board. I had a never-ending bruise on my thigh. It was I'm-glad-it's-not-short-season bad.

It was quite the endeavour rearranging all of that heavy furniture. I am glad that we did it, though, because it really opened our room up:

Before:

You can't tell but there is a large dresser just out of the range of this photo on the left side.

After:

We really like the extra room and I like not hitting my leg on the bed anymore. Of course the kids haven't been sneaking in our room too much since we moved the furniture.

Lest you think we have lint all over our comforter, those are actually feathers. I learned the hard way that you should carefully read the comforter description when you are trying to buy a down (and feather) free comforter.

Things Heard Around Here

2012-01-24T06:29:00.000-06:00

Let's do this.

Really??

Where are you punk?

Translation:
For Christmas Aric was given the Xbox game Cars 2. He first saw the game at Best Buy this past summer and begged us to allow him to play it whenever we were at the store. We decided it would make a good Christmas present. We were right, sort of...

Every day after nap time Aric asks to play his game. I am usually pretty accommodating because most days I'm trying to finish up some sewing task. Aric has learned how to turn on the game, log in and pick any race or car to play. It is a good thing he knows how to do all of that stuff because I am ignorant when it comes to video games.

It's not a bad thing, until those days when Ryan is home and the two of them play multi-player and race against each other. That's when the trash talking starts and I wonder, as I sew, which one of them is the child and which one is the adult.

Last night at dinner we were discussing this post and trying to figure out what Aric has said while playing. This was the conversation:

Ryan: What did you say?

Aric: I said, "Where are you punk?" then I shot you and you fell in the water.

Really???

Not Often

2012-01-20T08:42:00.001-06:00

It's not often that Aric and Kellyn play together without arguing. Most of the time they are either playing near each other, but not with each other. Usually when they do play together they end up fighting about something. Last night they played together. We didn't hear any fighting, instead we heard lots of shrieking, giggling and belly laughing. It was a wonderful noise and it really warmed my heart.

More Than a Glimpse, Part 2

2012-01-19T08:12:00.000-06:00

I honestly didn't think it would take this long for me to write this post. I thought, when I wrote the first post, that I would write a follow-up post soon after. I thought about what to write, but I think it is hard to write something when you are living it everyday. I'm not saying that Part 2 is completely over, but I am beginning to think that maybe I'm at the tail end of it and getting ready to move on to the next chapter.

After I was diagnosed with postpartum depression I read three books on the topic:

Down Came the Rain introduced me to the topic of postpartum depression and made me feel like I wasn't crazy. It didn't provide me with much help beyond that, but what it did do was spur me on to look for books written by people from a Christian perspective. The Lifter of My Head was an extreme case with the author spending time on the psych ward. While I did suffer from suicidal thoughts, it didn't get bad enough for me to need to be committed anywhere. I sought help and strength and I received those and much more. If I were to recommend any of these books it would be the last book I read, Living Beyond Postpartum Depression. It is a book that can be read by anyone; the person going through the depression, the spouse, family, friends, etc. It truly gives an insight on what is being battled, why, and ways in which one can seek help.

My life looks completely different now than it did six months ago, four months ago, or even a month ago. I was acting better, treating my family better, interacting more and actually living life instead of wanting to disappear from it all. Part of it was me making changes, but most of it was the medication. When I forgot to take my medication it was very evident the next day. I was irritable, impatient, and the horrible thoughts that used to plague me returned. At some point during the day I would stop to reflect on what was the matter with me and realize that I was off my medication. Some times it would overwhelm me. It seemed like I would never be able to get off of my medication. A few weeks ago I again forgot to take a pill. It was the first time that I realized I had missed my pill not by my actions and attitudes, but because I saw my pill still sitting in the case. It gave me hope; hope that I might be able to come off of the medication at some point in the future and be okay on my own.

Six months ago I would not have been able to handle all that is going on in my life. Starting a business of my own would not even have occurred to me, it didn't. The stress would have been too great. Somewhere along the way God has provided healing and renewal. I feel like a better person and I feel like pieces of me have been returned to me. I have so many creative ideas floating around in my head it's almost overwhelming. Overwhelming, yes, but a good kind of overwhelming. I have interacted more with people, made new, lasting friendships, and reconnected with old friends. I could barely interact with my kids and husband before.

And now... I'm beginning to see the light in my dark tunnel and I'm ready to feel the sunshine on my face.

Thinking Outside of the Box

2012-01-18T05:51:00.000-06:00

This past weekend I came home from running errands to this scene:

Ryan was cleaning out the garage and set up the vehicle ramps for Aric to use with his cars. I thought it was the best idea, something I would never have thought to do.

I guess that is what makes Ryan a pretty amazing dad.

Slaving Away in the Sweat Shoppe

2012-01-17T05:11:00.001-06:00

I have spent the past four days (the last week, actually) slaving away. I was working on my consignment order, which actually turned into a real order. Originally, I thought I was making 10 wristlets to ship up to Minnesota, they would be placed in an university bookstore and I would be paid as they were sold. Last week that all changed when I found out I would be paid up front for 24 wristlets with the possibility of ordering more depending on how they sold. It was kind of exciting and overwhelming all at the same time. I knew it was important to have them made, shipped and in the store before the semester text book rush begins. Thankfully, Ryan had a long weekend at just the right time and is very supportive of me. He entertained the kids, kept up with the house, meals and even took on some extra projects around the house. He was a trooper and my hero. Yesterday morning I finished the last of my custom order. They are boxed up and waiting for a trip to the post office today.

I am so thankful to be done with them and moving onto something else for the time being. They were a lot of work, but a break is nice. I'm glad I made a few extras to stock in my Etsy store.

I am now moving on to a bag order. I'm pretty excited to make more bags. I enjoy making them, especially since I purchased new fabric to use. I have material waiting to be made into scarves, pillows and I haven't even started thinking about the wreaths yet. I have a request to look into laptop case designs, another to make fun pillowcases for a day care and so many more ideas of my own floating around in my head. It can get overwhelming at times. Since my big order is done I can step back a bit and get my life balanced again; i.e.- spending more time playing with the kids and only working at nap time or in the evenings.

I truly enjoy having my own area to work in. It has already had a bit of revamping done to it:

Still located right next to the exercise equipment.

Ryan moved the shelves from another wall and installed them above my table.

A very important thing since I had no idea what colors I had and kept buying similar colors.

Fabric waiting to be made into something.

A cleaned off table. It did not look like this last week.

For now I'm going to take the morning off and get back to work this afternoon at nap time.

Things Heard Around Here

2012-01-16T04:56:00.000-06:00

Me: Aric, you're pretty cute.

Aric: I know.

Translation:
Apparently we need to teach some lessons in humility around here.

Things Heard Around Here

2012-01-12T05:22:00.001-06:00

Mommy, remember when you couldn't reach the Lightning McQueen balloon and you had to jump, but you still couldn't get it? You should eat your food and then you'll be taller.

Translation:
First of all, I guess Aric remembers things that happened months ago, things that are inconsequential to me. I only remembered when he reminded me. Secondly, our discussions at dinner time about eating all of your food so you can grow bigger seem to be sticking with him. Thirdly, we had a chat about how mommies and daddies are as tall as they are ever going to be.

Floating Shelves

2012-01-11T06:02:00.000-06:00

Ever since we moved into our home Ryan and I have wanted to flank the tv downstairs with floating shelves. The space around the tv was a huge void asking to have something fill it. Ryan has a collection of glasses from his travels around the world that needed to be displayed in a better way than lined up along the ledge.

We priced shelves, looked at projects to make our own, but couldn't find anything that we were happy with until last week. Ryan found a project that involved using a hollow core door and a 2x4. We bought the door and he made seven shelves of assorted sizes to hang on the wall. I took a break from sewing to help him stain and varnish the shelves. I think he did an amazing job.

The entire project only cost about $40 for materials and he still has enough door leftover to make more shelves. I think that will be our project for this coming weekend.

Hungry, Hungry Hippos

2012-01-10T04:59:00.001-06:00

The kids received the game Hungry, Hungry Hippos for Christmas. They love to play the game probably because it is loud and active. We left it out on the coffee table for awhile, but now it is put away when we are not playing it. We discovered it is not a game that can be left out without parental supervision for one important reason:

Marble girl can't be trusted!

Things Heard Around Here

2012-01-09T05:02:00.001-06:00

Minute, minute, where are you?

Translation:
When you drop a mitten outside they always come when called, especially when you call them "minutes".

Now Open For Business

2012-01-07T12:57:00.001-06:00

My shop is not as fully stocked as I would have liked, but I decided it was better to at least get it going then to wait any longer. I have so much on my plate right now that it will be some time before I can add the variety of merchandise for the store. More to follow on staining and varnishing floating shelves for Ryan, my consignment order, a secret project I've been working on and the usual assortment of blogs about our life.

In the meantime:

Visit my Etsy site.

Like my Facebook page.

Always

2012-01-06T05:58:00.006-06:00

After 15 years of togetherness, 9 years of marriage, 2 kids, and all of the ups and downs life together can bring; this man still makes my heart beat faster:

Happy Anniversary, Ryan. I love you. Always.

Independence

2012-01-05T06:00:00.000-06:00

As a mother I realize that Aric and Kellyn, because of their ages, are not allowed to make many decisions for themselves. Ryan and I tell them what to drink, eat, when to go to bed, where they are going, etc. One way in which I have relinquished control and allowed them to be independent is in deciding what clothes they wear. After breakfast the kids get dressed for the day. I usually don't have a problem with what Aric wears. Sometimes the colors don't match, sometimes he wears a polo shirt with athletic pants, but usually he picks out the same three or four outfits. Kellyn, well, she's a different story...

Kellyn doesn't like socks and will usually take them off within the first half hour of having them put on. She prefers to pick out pajamas to wear all day. Some days I indulge her and allow her to wear pajamas, other days it's more important that she pick out pants and a shirt. When I get her past the pajama battle she will pick out a pair of pants and a jacket. This always causes another battle to ensue when I pick out a shirt for her to wear under the jacket. When I finally get her dressed this usually happens:

Pants and socks are gone.

She had been wearing those shoes, but kicked them off as I grabbed the camera.

The rest of us might be bundled up but Kellyn will run around without any pants on. It's probably a good thing that she likes to wear jackets, then at least some part of her is warm.

Outfit of choice when we went outside to play yesterday.

One normally dressed kid.

The Sweat Shoppe

2012-01-04T08:33:00.002-06:00

When I made Kellyn's tutu I felt hopelessly lost in the craft department. Everything that I tried to make did not turn out as well as it did in my head. I was full of vision, but I couldn't translate that vision into reality. Not long after the tutu mishap (which wasn't so much of a mishap because I remade it using less tulle and a ribbon instead of elastic) I went to a craft fair with some dear friends. At the craft fair I was inspired, so inspired that on the way home we stopped at a fabric store to pick up supplies to make some things on our own. The woman cutting my fabric asked what I was making, when I told her about my day and what I planned to make she said, "things never turn out and that's why we should just buy things at the craft shows instead of attempting to make them." Ignoring the particularly snarky comment from the sales woman who apparently doesn't work on commission, I went home and proceeded to let my creativity flow.

I made two wreaths:

Made with gray fleece. Bow not included and was removed after this picture was taken.

Made with burlap.

The wreaths were just the inspiration that I needed. They made some long dormant part of me come back alive. Those wreaths led to more wreaths, which led to scarves and pillows (yeah, I don't really question the direction my creativity took.)

Made with grey fleece and felt flowers.

Grey fleece pillow. Crown Royal quilt made by Ryan's Grandmother- no you can't have it.

Unfortunately I don't have any photos of the scarves. They were sewn using the hand-me down Bernina I was given. It used to belong to Ryan's grandmother.

I have sewn off and on over the years, but have never sewn on a machine that I really liked. I always had trouble with threading the machine, tension, attention span and whatever else could possibly go wrong while sewing. Something happened while I sewed those scarves, I began to figure out the machine and get a rhythm going. Then I realized I didn't mind sewing so much and wanted to sew more things. While Ryan's parents were visiting over Thanksgiving his mom encouraged my sewing. I told her that I was thinking about sewing a quilt for Aric. For Christmas she bought me a table to sew on, since sewing at our dining table was a hassle.

My sewing/craft table

She also bought fabric and supplies for me while we were out shopping on Black Friday.

Fabric for Aric's new quilt.

I worked on Aric's quilt for awhile, but then put it on hold while I worked on making wreaths, scarves and pillows for Christmas presents. (Sorry due to the camera being gone for repairs no photos were taken.) I loved every moment of it. I felt creatively alive again, a feeling I haven't felt in a long time. It got me thinking... would anyone want to buy anything that I made? My Christmas gifts were well received, either that or people were just being nice, but it gave me more confidence in myself.

That's when I found the pattern for these bags:

Ryan's mom was given one and asked me how to figure out how they were made. They have a tape measure closure. I found the pattern an enjoyed making them. I began toying with the idea of opening an Etsy shop. I had originally thought about craft fairs, and while I'm still not opposed to it, it would be difficult with Ryan's schedule and two little kids. Etsy seemed easier, there is very little overhead and if it didn't work out as I had hoped all I have to do is close the shop.

With this idea in my head I began to work more in what I lovingly referred to as my sweat shop:

Located by my stationary bike and treadmill

Bags ready to be assembled.

Store inventory

A small ID wristlet prototype.

My Etsy store isn't open for business yet, but I'm getting there. I want to make a couple of wreaths, pillows and scarves. I need to finish writing my shop policies, figure out shipping prices and all of the other mundane parts of running a small business. I'll let you know when it's up and running and ready for business.

Then after that I'll return to Aric's dinosaur quilt.

Things Heard Around Here

2012-01-03T07:19:00.000-06:00

When I get bigger my teeth will fall out, but I'm not big yet.

Translation:
I'm not sure where Aric heard this. He is not so much worried about his teeth falling out as he is ready to be big and play with the little Legos.

Awhile back Aric was with me as I was pulling things out of a downstairs closet. Inside that closet he discovered we have a large plastic bin full of little Legos. Most of the Legos are my older brother's Legos that were given to Aric and Kellyn after he died. He loved playing with Legos. A few of them are Ryan's Legos from childhood. They are waiting in the closet for the day when the kids will be old enough to enjoy them and create their own memories.

For Christmas Santa gave Ryan the Lego Black Pearl pirate ship and while at Target last week Ryan found the Lego Queen Anne's Revenge on clearance. Ryan let Aric help him assemble the Queen Anne's Revenge, but informed Aric he was not allowed to play with it until he was bigger. Ever since Aric has been obsessed with getting bigger so he can play with the Legos.

I guess the Duplos aren't going to cut it anymore.

Happy New Years

2012-01-01T07:55:00.000-06:00

It's hard not to reflect at this time of the year. It's the start of a new, fresh year and I wonder how it will be. It'll probably go by rather quickly like last year and I'll be sitting around wondering how that happened.

Christmas this year was wonderful and busy. My aunt was here this past week for a visit. We played with the kids, sat around talking and watched silly movies. I like visits like that; where not much is accomplished but lots of catching up.

I've been busy with kids, making gifts for people, illness and two year molars, and working in my sweat shop (more on that soon). Sometimes I feel a bit too busy- like I haven't stopped enough to play, laugh, and just have a good time, like I've become too wrapped up in myself.

Which leads me to my New Years Resolutions that can be summarized in one big resolution to treat myself, my family, friends and others better.

Happy New Years from our family to yours!

Growing Up

2011-12-27T12:49:00.000-06:00

I can tell Kellyn is growing up from a toddler into a little girl. The signs are not only evident in the way she is physically changing but in the way her room is changing. On Christmas day Ryan rearranged her furniture to make enough room to move in her new dollhouse. We moved things around her walls and put in some bins to organize her toys. I moved her butterfly hooks and made a little dress up area for her. I love sitting in her room now and playing; it brings back fond memories of the hours spent dressing up and playing with dolls when I was growing up.

I was scared to have a little girl, but truthfully I'm loving every moment.

Christmas

2011-12-26T11:12:00.000-06:00

This year Christmas was relaxing. We weren't painting and moving; enough said. While we did use the Elf on a Shelf and visited Santa, we really wanted to teach Aric and Kellyn about the reason for Christmas. When we purchased, wrapped and mailed gifts we talked to the kids about Jesus' birthday and why we give everyone gifts. They were pretty excited to give and receive gifts this year. They were so excited about receiving gifts that by the 24th our tree looked like this:

Kellyn initially only pulled the bows off the packages, but by the end she was unwrapping my gifts; not hers, just mine. I think she was being devious and getting the both of best worlds: the pleasure of unwrapping presents while leaving all of hers alone.

We celebrate Christmas on Christmas Eve. Both Ryan and I grew up celebrating on Christmas Eve. After dinner and baths we sat down to read the birth of Jesus in the kid's bible. Then we prayed and lit our German pyramid while discussing the figures in the Nativity.

After a quick picture it was time to open presents.

The kids had fun opening their gifts and playing with some of the toys.

The next day, on Christmas, we did some rearranging in the kid's bedrooms. They both needed areas opened up for their toys. We also spent the day breaking up fights over the new toys. That is the not so fun part of Christmas that Ryan and I don't remember from childhood.

Aric's favorite toys are his new V-Reader, dinosaurs and remote control Mater car.

Kellyn's favorite toys are her dress up clothes, computer, doll house, and the fuchsia jacket that she always wants to wear now. I might have some problems on laundry day.

We hope your Christmas was as good and relaxing as ours without the fights over toys.

Things Heard Around Here

2011-12-20T07:20:00.000-06:00

Heave pull.

Translation:
Kellyn says this when tugging or pulling on something. I assume she is trying to say "heave ho". As to why she thinks she's a pirate... I guess she has a very vivid imagination.

Attachment

2011-12-19T07:38:00.000-06:00

I have decided Kellyn has a weird attachment to oversized stuffed animals:

And her daddy has a weak spot when it comes to making her extremely happy.

Christmas Time

2011-12-15T08:26:00.000-06:00

We are definitely in full Christmas mode around here. Most of my gifts are complete. I have one last gift left to purchase and just a few more to wrap then I'm done. What a relief. Our Christmas traditions are well under way.

One of the traditions I brought with me, and Ryan gladly embraced, is making Cherry Candy Crackles. They are my favorite Christmas cookie. We joke about Christmas not coming until we make them. Sure enough every year they get made. Some years they may be the only cookie we ever get around to making. They are a lot of work, but so worth it.

Every year I dig out the candy thermometer to use. These cookies are the only reason I even own a candy thermometer.

My dad hand chops the cherries and mixes the dough by hand. I cheat and use a food processor and mixer.

Yummy pink goodness. It gets chilled overnight before it can be rolled into balls and baked. I usually stick it outside or in the garage. It works just as well.

These cookies go fast.

As soon as I saw it, I had no trouble picking out Aric's ornament this year. Aric loves dinosaurs. He likes to watch TV shows and movies about them, play with them and he is quite knowledgeable about their names.

I had a bit more trouble deciding on an ornament for Kellyn. I was looking for something to encompass her likes of: babies, princesses, dress-up, butterflies, Mickey Mouse, penguins, elephants, puppies, horses, and cars. Since that ornament was a bit hard to come by I let Kellyn pick out her own ornament. She was quite fond of this elephant.

I didn't really decorate our basement much for Christmas. I did, however, put up a small three foot Christmas tree on top of our cat scratching post. Classy, I know. It it our White House Christmas tree. ~~I wonder how many people googling that phrase will end up here.~~ I have eight years worth of White House Christmas ornaments given to us by my parents. It is fun to pull them out each year and compare them. I look forward to the new ornament every year.

I haven't ever purchased a nativity set. I'm still looking for that one special set, the one I will know when I see it. Last year Kellyn was given a nativity set.

Kellyn frequently sits in front of it playing with the people and animals. She thinks the angel is a butterfly. Aric on the other hand likes to mess with it and change out which character is standing on top of the barn. Mary was up there one day.

This Christmas we have been intentional about explaining to the kids the meaning of Christmas and why we give gifts. I asked my parents to pass along a manger that we used as kids.

When the kids do a good deed or a task without complaining they get to put a piece of straw in the manger. The manger gets filled and on Christmas morning baby Jesus is placed in the manger. It is a good way to remind the kids daily of the reason for Christmas.

And this one is still making an appearance around the house every day:

Some days I feel like I'm racking my brain trying to find a new place to put him.

A Visit with Santa

2011-12-14T05:05:00.002-06:00

On Monday I took the kids to the mall ~~to get us out of the house to preserve some sanity~~ to see Santa. Aric asked Santa for a "monster truck" and told Santa he loved him. Kellyn was more interested in the paper reindeer antlers Santa was giving away. Me, well I was just thankful no one was screaming this year.

Things Heard Around Here

2011-12-13T06:44:00.000-06:00

Me three.

Example:
Aric: I miss Pam.
Mommy: Me too.
Kellyn: Me three.

I'm not sure where Kellyn picked up "me three", but she has used it accurately several times over the past week. It makes me laugh to hear a two year old sound so eloquent.

Naming Things

2011-12-08T06:27:00.000-06:00

We have some difficulty when it comes to naming things. The kids haven't caught on that they are allowed to bestow any name that they would like on their animals, fish, babies, you get the point.

Awhile ago we let the kids each pick out a fish at the pet store. Aric wanted a black fish and Kellyn picked an orange fish with three black circles on its tail fin that look like a Mickey Mouse head. Kellyn likes Mickey Mouse. When we asked the kids what they wanted to name their fish Kellyn quickly gravitated towards the obvious choice of "Mickey Mouse". Aric was a bit coy about naming his fish. We went through lists of names with Aric from favorite movies, cartoons, books, toys, family member names, and random names trying to get him to pick one. Aric always said, "later". Eventually "Later" stuck either that or we realized that he had originally wanted to name the fish "Later".

It comes as no surprise, then, that this year when we, as a family, sat down to name our Elf on a Shelf, he was given the moniker "Scout". He is a scout elf for Santa after all. Yeah, we're pretty original around here.

Decorating for Christmas

2011-12-07T07:53:00.000-06:00

This past weekend we decorated the house for Christmas. It was fun to decorate the house this year, especially since Christmas last year consisted of painting, moving, and an empty house. The kids were pretty excited to be decorating for Christmas and to see their ornaments. While I helped the kids decorate the tree, Ryan documented everything with our camera.

Note: The following photos are unedited other than shrinking them to upload them:

We decided to put the tree upstairs this year so we can keep an eye on it.

I like how easy pre-lit trees are. At least until the lights stop working.

Note the tree skirt in the box. One of Ryan's aunts made it and sent it to us a few years ago.

It really was a mess and we discovered mouse nests in some of our boxes from being stored in the shed at the farm.

Cleaned up and decorated for Christmas.

Cute photo. Too bad it's blurry.

No one wanted to smile at the camera anymore.

Aric is still cooperating and Kellyn is slowly sneaking away.

Our tree skirt: Ryan's old Army poncho liner. It's a tradition that we started in early marriage because we didn't have a tree skirt and couldn't afford to get one.

After these photos were taken I realized my camera really did need to go back in to be fixed. It hasn't been the same since it was "fixed" this summer. It isn't able to focus clearly and most of my pictures are blurry and very out of focus. I'm hoping they get it fixed and back to me in time for Christmas. Though, I'm not holding my breath that it will be fixed or back in time.

Change

2011-12-06T05:04:00.002-06:00

I said "change is coming". The change is here:

Aric's room before.

Aric's room after with a new chalkboard wall.

There are two shades of green in his room now.

Aric quit sleeping in his room. For weeks he climbed into our bed in the middle of the night. Even with a king size bed, Ryan and I were no longer getting enough rest. When we began questioning Aric about why he would not stay in his room he told us he was scared of his room and wanted it to be green. While everyone said they loved the shade of blue in Aric's room the paint was dark and I had used a flat; both of which sucked the light out of the room.

We took Aric to Home Depot and had him help us pick out some different samples of green, brought them home and had Aric pick one out that he liked. He picked two. We used Aric's two choices and painted an accent wall to add some depth to the room. I knew the color of green would brighten the room considerably, but as an extra precaution I made sure the finish we bought was satin to help reflect light. We had just enough left over chalkboard paint from downstairs to paint a small chalkboard wall in his bedroom.

In addition to the paint we ordered Aric a bookshelf like Kellyn's to replace the cheap particle board bookshelf he was currently using. Aric's room is much brighter and he has, for the most part, spent the whole night sleeping in his own bed. Ryan and I are very thankful for that.

ABC's

2011-12-05T05:59:00.000-06:00

We have worked hard with Aric to teach him his ABC's; not only to sing them but to recognize the letters too. He is quite proficient at singing the song and arranging the letters in order. In the next step of learning to read, we began teaching him how to write letters. I think he did pretty well on his first attempt:

Teaching him to spell will be high on my priority list. I wouldn't want to be the mother of this person:

The one who couldn't spell funny and had it printed all over a bolt of fleece.

Hopefully they caught the mistake somewhere along the line.

Things Heard Around Here

2011-12-01T05:30:00.000-06:00

Mommy, gwamma me.

Translation:
Mommy, grab my feet and let go.

Every day since the swing set was installed the kids have wanted to be outside playing on it. Kellyn, in particular, spends her time swinging. That's all she wants to do. She really likes it when whomever is pushing her stands in front of her, grabs her feet, pulls her forward up high and lets go. She's a little daredevil and shrieks with delight when swinging up high.

Cookies

2011-11-30T06:49:00.000-06:00

While Grandma was here the kids decorated Christmas sugar cookies. I have never made or decorated sugar cookies before. After helping and observing, I now know why. They are tons of work, messy and don't taste that great. If I'm going to put forth the effort to make cookies they are going to be a cookie I or someone in my family enjoys eating.

If you look closely you'll notice the bite missing from Kellyn's cookie. Several cookies were harmed in a similar manner during the process of decorating

Aric had the most fun decorating cookies and stuck it out with Grandma until all of the cookies were decorated.

Nothing says Christmas like neon food coloring.

Definitely not magazine quality decorating, but the kids had fun. Hopefully they realize that mommy won't be doing this again and they will have to wait on Grandma to return before they'll get to decorate cookies again.

An Early Christmas Gift

2011-11-29T12:38:00.001-06:00

Ryan's parents came to visit last week to celebrate Thanksgiving with us. While they were here they gave the kids an early Christmas present. It was a huge hit and I have a feeling we will be bundled up outside playing on it as much as possible.

Creative Play

2011-11-28T07:22:00.000-06:00

It makes me smile sometimes when I see the toys left out after play was disrupted. Where else would you find a housewife hanging out with a horse and a fireman...

...or an elephant driving the baby in a minivan...

...than in the mind of a child overflowing with creativity?

Change

2011-11-26T12:40:00.000-06:00

...is coming.

Thankful

2011-11-24T13:06:00.000-06:00

Today I am thankful for:

A loving God who never gives me more than I can handle.

A supportive and loving husband who is committed to share the good and the bad with me.

Two wonderful children who have truly blessed and filled our lives.

Family and friends who are always there for us.

To not have to work on Thanksgiving for the first year in quite a long time.

Wishing you a wonderful and blessed Thanksgiving day!

Kinect

2011-11-18T06:08:00.003-06:00

For his birthday this year Ryan received an upgraded Xbox that came with a Kinect. Ryan uses the Xbox quite frequently, but the Kinect would go unused if it weren't for one member of our family.

We bought the game Kinectimals for the kids and Aric loves it. He asks us to "play the tiger game" anytime he thinks about it. Since he's quite active while playing the game, I don't feel like a terrible mother for allowing my three year old to play video games.

Things Heard Around Here

2011-11-16T06:22:00.000-06:00

Kellyn: I want be a cowboy.

Me: No, you can't be a cowboy.

Aric: I want to be dressed as a biker again.

Me: No, you can't be a biker at church.

I do not want to squash my children's dreams or abilities to make decisions for themselves. I want them to grow up and be able to choose things on their own. In small ways we allow them to pick out their own clothes. ~~Some times~~ Most times they don't match and look a bit silly, but they are always quite proud of choosing what to wear. That being said I draw the line at wearing costumes out of the house, especially to church. For the record I do not have any problem with bikers going to church or cowboys, either, for that matter.

My Knee

2011-11-15T06:08:00.000-06:00

Six weeks ago I had knee surgery. I mentioned it prior to the surgery, but have not wanted to talk about it since. The knee surgery was "life changing". It's not drastic in the way that I am now missing a knee, but it's big enough that I have to make some significant changes in my life.

This wasn't my first knee surgery. I had surgery on the same knee six years ago.  During the six years in between there were a few times when I thought I might need surgery again. My knee, however, calmed down and I didn't think about it again until this past May. I still have no idea how I injured it in May. I went running in the morning, played outside with the kids while wearing flip flops and by evening I was in an excruciating amount of pain and couldn't bend my knee to 90 degrees.

During surgery my surgeon discovered that I have terrible cartilage (or as Ryan likes to say, "I have the knee of a 400lb man"). My cartilage is softer than it is supposed to be and it shreds and flakes off. My knee pain and other problems happen when the cartilage is too rough and chewed up from wear and pieces fall off and get in the way of my knee functioning. The bad thing about cartilage is that they can't fix it. It can be cleaned off and smoothed out, but they can't ever replace what I am losing.

What does that mean for me? Well, the biggest change of all is that I am not supposed to run anymore. I can jog for short distances, but I am not allowed to run long distances. Running has always been my choice for cardio and not being able to run is heartbreaking and leaves me out of sorts. I hate the elliptical machine with a passion and I'm not a fan of the recumbent bike.  That doesn't leave many options. Since surgery I have used my treadmill to walk and I bought a stationary bike stand for my mountain bike. There's something different about riding on the mountain bike that makes me feel like I'm actually accomplishing something.

I have to wear sensible shoes with high arches that will help take the stress off of my knee. Thankfully "sensible shoes" do not mean ugly shoes anymore. However, "sensible shoes" still mean "expensive shoes". Too bad the doctor couldn't write a prescription for shoes. I had to clean out my closet of shoes that weren't going to be supportive for me. There was no point in hanging onto shoes that will only damage my knee further.

Other changes I have to make are to work hard to keep my quad muscles in good shape. That is difficult since I was also given limitations in what I can do.  I can't do leg extensions, lunges or any other exercise that will put my knee in a 90 degree angle or greater. I worked with a physical therapist who gave me some good exercises to start with. Over time as I get stronger I'll have to figure out some different things to do to keep my leg strong and change things up for me so I won't be bored. I am also taking large doses of glucosamine and chondroitin. It may not be proven to be effective, but people swear by it and there is no harm in trying it for my knee.

On my six week follow-up appointment the doctor told me he would see me later. Hopefully with the changes I make that won't happen for a long time.

Busy

2011-11-14T13:46:00.000-06:00

I've been a bit busy lately and the first thing to go when I'm busy is the blog. Sorry, but that's the reality of my life. I had two sick children, one of whom is cutting ~~four~~ three molars. It put mommy a bit on edge dealing with two fussy, needy children. We're doing better now that both kids are healthy again.

In addition to taking care of the kids I have been preoccupied with making Christmas gifts. I decided to make Christmas gifts this year for most of our family and friends. I'm pretty excited about my projects and hope that everyone else likes them as much as I do. If they don't, I hope they don't let on that they dislike them. Currently I am about half way through. I hope to have the rest underway this week.

If that's not enough I spent a good portion of last week in the kitchen making food. Ryan was promoted at work and in keeping with tradition we provided a meal for his coworkers. I made dozens and dozens of cookies, pasta salad and peeled eggs for deviled eggs until my fingers literally bled. Don't worry, I didn't send the bloody egg along. Last Thursday I spent the day baking bread. I was given a Friendship bread starter and Thursday it was ready to bake. I made chocolate chip bread, pumpkin bread, mixed berry bread and lemon poppy seed bread. It's all waiting in the freezer to be eaten for breakfast.

The last few days I've been working on our dining room table. The finish on the table was already wearing away. It just couldn't stand up to heat, cold or a three year old. It was painful to sand the table and scuff it up further, but its easier to redo the finish now than to refinish the entire table later. The table is now polyurethaned and drying. It should stand up to the kids now.

And that is why I haven't been blogging.

A Handful

2011-11-07T06:54:00.000-06:00

Ever since turning two this one has been keeping us on our toes:

If you leave her for two seconds she'll likely wind up somewhere she doesn't belong.

We, mistakenly, thought she started the terrible two's before turning two. We were wrong. While she may have dipped her toe into the water to test it out, when she turned two she jumped right in and waves have been splashing ever since.

Frequently we hear the phrase, "I'm not... (insert taking nap, changing diaper, or other appropriate phrase here)". I feel like I'm in a constant battle and some days I'm pretty weary from the effort I'm expending to teach and train her. I remember some pretty terrible incidents with Aric, but I don't remember the magnitude and volume that I am experiencing now.

Regardless, I know the two's don't last forever. We'll be on to another age and stage before I know it.

Kellyn may be a handful, but she's my handful and I wouldn't trade her for anything.

Things Heard Around Here

2011-11-03T06:54:00.001-05:00

I pick one.

Translation:
I would like to choose a piece of Halloween candy from my bucket. I guess we'll be hearing this one for awhile.

The Biker and the Sheriff

2011-10-31T21:13:00.000-05:00

This evening my friend, Laura, came over to help me take the kids out to Trick or Treat. This was the first Halloween that the kids (or I) have ever been out Trick or Treating. It was definitely a strange experience for me. I don't like asking people for things. Going door to door to ring the doorbell and ask for candy is really out of my comfort zone.

Ryan's parents sent Aric the appropriate gear to turn him into a biker dude. I originally debated between turning Aric into a pirate or a sheriff and was finally settled on sheriff when the biker gear arrived. Aric fell in love with the biker gear ~~until he saw the Buzz Lightyear costume at Target and told everyone he was going to be Buzz for Halloween~~.

We were undecided on whether Kellyn would go and figured we would turn her into a princess or have her wear her tutu if she accompanied us. This evening Ryan suggested we turn her into a sheriff since I had purchased a sheriff's badge for Aric. I scrounged around the house and came up with an appropriate cowgirl outfit for her.

At the first house, after ringing the doorbell, Kellyn thought she was supposed to go inside. Some houses and costumed revelers were just too scary for the kids, but all in all they had a good time once they got the hang of it. I was glad for Laura's company while walking about the neighborhood.

Now if I can just figure out how to take them on walks without having them think we need to stop at every one's house for candy.

And the best part of Ryan's night, besides getting to stay home and watch the Chiefs game, was having a little girl squeal and yell "Winnie the Pooh, Winnie the Pooh" to her mother as she pointed at Aric's Backson pumpkin.

Pumpkin Carving

2011-10-31T13:26:00.000-05:00

Ryan was gone last weekend when the kids and I carved three of our pumpkins. This morning he and the kids carved the remaining two pumpkins that we had saved.

Ryan and Aric decided to turn Aric's pumpkin into a Backson complete with horns, red hair and a nose ring:

Kellyn's pumpkin was turned into a face with a big toothy grin:

The kids were not cooperating with the camera today:

Our pumpkins to include our two shriveled up, no longer smiling pumpkins from last weekend:

The real Backson:

Things Heard Around Here

2011-10-28T06:00:00.001-05:00

Heard as Aric and Kellyn run around the house: Tick Tock, Tick Tock, Tick Tock

Me: Aric, are you pretending to be a clock?

Aric: No, I'm a crocodile.

Translation:
Too much Jake and the Neverland Pirates.

Aric's Artwork

2011-10-27T05:27:00.002-05:00

Lately Aric's drawings have become more recognizable. Yesterday he drew this on our chalkboard wall:

When I asked him what it was he told me it was the "Backson" from Winnie the Pooh. He and Kellyn watched the new Winnie the Pooh movie the other night. Too bad it was on the chalkboard wall and it was only captured on my camera phone.

Pumpkins

2011-10-26T07:20:00.000-05:00

This past weekend I took the kids to a harvest party. We spent the evening carving pumpkins, roasting hot dogs, singing, going on a hay rack ride, conversing with friends, running around chasing other kids, playing with glow sticks (or glue sticks as Aric calls them) and roasting marshmallows. The kids were up past their bedtime and had a wonderful time. I am thankful to have friends who are thoughtful enough to include us in their activities.

One of the most exciting parts of the night was the pumpkin carving. Aric and Kellyn were able to pick out their own pumpkins and request the type of face they wanted carved into it. They aren't pumpkins that will win any kind of contests, but the kids were pleased to have their very own pumpkin. We brought our pumpkins home and set them on our doorstep.

Since the party it has been unseasonably warm (in the 80's) and the pumpkins have shriveled up in the heat. Aric is quite upset every time he sees his pumpkin. He specifically requested his pumpkin have a smiley face and the newly shriveled up face looks scary not happy. There is no way to explain to a three year old about pumpkins, heat, and rotting.

Thankfully we have two more pumpkins left to carve. We're leaving them for this weekend. Hopefully they will take his mind off the little, shriveled up, scary pumpkin sitting on our doorstep.

Things Heard Around Here

2011-10-21T06:30:00.000-05:00

Mommy, can we play the goose game?

Translation:
Can we play duck, duck, goose?

Aric learned how to play "the goose game" this past week at church. At the time that he asked this, Daddy was at work and Kellyn was sleeping. I explained to Aric that we would need to wait until after Daddy came home to play. After dinner we all went downstairs to play "the goose game", which is more running around in circles and squealing than actually trying to make it to the recently vacated spot.

The Help

2011-10-20T06:23:00.000-05:00

This past weekend Ryan ran a marathon in the big city as part of a relay team. His team came in first in the team division. On his way home from the race, Ryan stopped at a furniture store to check out their selection of fireplaces. (We've discussed installing one downstairs, because it gets so cold down there during the winter time.) He didn't find a fireplace, but he found a TV on a too-good-to-pass-on-it-sale. It was everything he had been looking for, since we realized we were going to have to eventually replace our TV upstairs.

Ryan spent the rest of the weekend moving TVs around, installing TV mounts, and rewiring the electronics. He had a helper while he worked upstairs:

When he asked for a screw, she brought him every screw she could find. Ran off with all of his tools and had a marvelous time helping Daddy. Seeing them like that reminded me of this picture:

I guess when you have little kids, you always have a helper at the ready.

A Recipe

2011-10-18T15:16:00.000-05:00

Recently I've seen the following recipe in a couple of different places. I don't always try recipes I've seen on other blogs, but I like pumpkin, chocolate, and spice cake. I figured all three mixed together would be an amazing combination and I would give it a go.

Easy Pumpkin Muffins

Ingredients:
1 can pumpkin
1 box spice cake
1 cup of water
chocolate chips if desired

Mix ingredients together and pour in muffin tins. Bake at 350 for 18 to 20 minutes. Makes 24 muffins.

They were moist and delicious. The muffins were so good I decided I'm going to make them, top them with cream cheese frosting and bring them to a fall party this weekend. I can't wait to have them again!

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Regarding my canning experience, I followed the instructions from this site. I picked that recipe to follow because it had step by step instructions with pictures and I've never canned before. If only I had poured more water into my jar and actually left it alone overnight then it may have worked a little better.

Canning

2011-10-18T07:02:00.000-05:00

Yesterday I embarked on my first endeavor to can tomatoes. I had everything I needed: mason jars, tomatoes from the garden, and a water bath canner that my aunt gave me when we visited her this summer.

Seventeen tomatoes seems like quite a bit, but it's not. All that work and I only had one quart size jar of tomatoes. The jar had to process in the water bath for 50 minutes. That was a lot of water for one measly jar of tomatoes. My upstairs turned into a sauna for the rest of the day.

After I pulled the jar out, I put it on the counter to cool down. I was pretty worried because it hadn't sealed by last night. I gave up on it and put it in the fridge, figuring that we would be making chili this week. This morning I checked on the jar and it sealed overnight in the fridge. I don't have great confidence in it and plan to leave it in the fridge until we make that batch of chili.

I think next time I'll make tomato sauce and use pint size jars.

Things Heard Around Here

2011-10-15T07:33:00.000-05:00

Where's the bunny?

Translation:
Aric will ask this question randomly when we are at the grocery store. He doesn't ask on every trip, but when he does it makes me laugh. I laugh because the bunny he is referring to is actually the Easter bunny. Aric saw the bunny walking around the store last Easter while we were in the produce department. He was terrified of the giant bunny and refused to go anywhere near it. It must have made a huge impression, though, for Aric to still be bringing it up six months later.

Why I Don't Craft Much

2011-10-14T05:09:00.001-05:00

Whenever I decide to get crafty and replicate something I've seen disaster always seems to strike. Things that I make just don't turn out quite like I think they should. For instance I decided to make Kellyn a tutu. Why spend $20 or $30 when I could spend less than half of that and make her one on my own? I'll tell you why- those expensive tutus are much nicer than mine.

It's not that my tutu looks terrible:

It looks nice and Kellyn seemed to like it. She pranced around the house for awhile. The problem with my tutu is that it stretched out and won't go back in:

It's now too big for her and I need to take it in. Sigh.

...And this is why I don't craft much.

Books

2011-10-13T06:10:00.000-05:00

One of the advantages of staying at home is that I am able to do things that I never would have the time to do before. I never went to garage sales (though two garage sales doesn't count as an experienced garage-saler), or any sort of community event. Two weeks ago I found out about a book sale at the library. For $5 we could fill a paper grocery sack with books. I was excited to go. Not because I was looking for anything I might want to read, but because I wanted to get more books for Aric and Kellyn.

Ryan had to take us to the book sale because I was still on crutches recovering from surgery. It was a lot of effort on both of are parts, I was hobbling around on crutches and Ryan was trying to corral two children and carry everything. Despite all of the effort, I think it was a success.

The books go quite well with Kellyn's birthday present:

Her books had been stacked on the floor between the wall and the dresser. Now they are neatly displayed and easily accessible.

It's a good thing we all like to read.

Two

2011-10-12T06:00:00.000-05:00

When I was pregnant and discovered Kellyn was a girl, I was terrified. I had a boy and thought I wanted another one. What was I going to do with a girl? Gradually, as the pink began to arrive, the idea began to grow on me and after I had Kellyn I realized it wasn't so difficult to have a girl. She's different from her brother, but just as easy to love. Kellyn brings so much to our family, things I didn't know we were missing before we had her.

It is hard to believe how fast time has gone. Happy 2nd Birthday to my sweet little girl!

Warm Days of Fall

2011-10-07T06:34:00.001-05:00

Lately, we have had some really nice, warm days. In addition to caring for me, the kids and the house while I recover, my hard-working husband has taken advantage of those days and dug up our fence posts.

After digging them out, he mixed up concrete and poured it in to reinforce the posts.

At this point he has only reinforced the inside of the fence. Right now our neighbor is reseeding their yard and we didn't want to upset them by digging up their grass seed. Already the fence is much more solid than it was before, and we think this will be enough to keep it stable.

I have left our doors open to enjoy the fresh air and sunny days. The view from my door makes me smile:

I like seeing the flowers blooming, the bees flying and the sun shining on everything. The mums are now exploding with color.

This flowerpot I filled with half-dead, clearance flowers in the hottest part of the summer:

The flowers definitely came to life after they were fertilized and watered regularly. The large red and yellow flowers have just started to bloom for the first time. I really like them but can't remember what they were.

We're all enjoying the warm, sunny days, because we know they won't last for long.

The Unicorn

2011-10-06T19:11:00.000-05:00

We went to the grocery store the other night for some milk, bananas, and glucosamine for my knee. We came home with something extra. I give you two guesses as to what it was:

If you guessed a large, pink unicorn you win. Kellyn squealed with delight when she saw it and didn't want to let it go. She cried when the clerk had to take it to ring it up.

Since it came home, she has slept with it every night. Shocking, I know! Kellyn sits on it, bounces on it and walks around the house pretending to ride it. She is quite protective of it and won't allow anyone else to play with it or touch it. She has tried to bring it with her to her high chair to eat, carried it along to diaper changes, and last night used it as her blanket while she was sleeping.

I am just thankful she hasn't decided that it needs to go outside to play or along to the store. Yet!

Things Heard Around Here

2011-10-05T05:52:00.000-05:00

Pop, Awic.

Translation:
I hopped over Aric's clothes. Can also be interchanged with Mommy, Daddy or Kellyn.

When I fold clothes I tend to sit on the living room floor to sort and fold them. Kellyn likes to jump and tries to jump over the clothes. Her jumps never seem to clear whatever is lying folded on the floor and she usually ends up jumping on the clothes or somewhat dragging the clothes with her. It usually takes me twice as long to fold laundry when Kellyn decides she needs to "pop".

The Mark, Part II

2011-10-04T13:14:00.000-05:00

In case you've been waiting on the edge of your seat to find out what the mark is, I have the answer:

The purple mark is the doctor's initials "BP".

Yeah, I don't think it looks like a "BP", and the doctor said he doesn't think it looks much like a "BP", either. You have to love doctor's penmanship.

The Mohawk

2011-10-04T05:07:00.001-05:00

It's every mother's dream to have a daughter with a mohawk, right?

It's not??

What if your daughter still has hair that can't be tamed?

Frequently when Kellyn wakes up in the morning her hair is somewhat flattened on the sides, but still sticking straight up.

It's a pretty cute mohawk, but then I might be a bit biased.

The Mark

2011-10-03T07:01:00.000-05:00

Tomorrow is my post-op appointment with my orthopedic surgeon. One of many questions I have for him is this:

What did you draw on my leg?

Is it a 3? An M? An E? A weird arrow? The Rebel Alliance symbol?

I just want to know what it is and when it will wash off.

Aric Vs. The Shopping Cart

2011-10-02T12:43:00.000-05:00

Aric fell on Friday and hit his face on a shopping cart while at the Home Depot with Ryan and Kellyn. Ryan called on the way home to let me know I needed to pull out the first aid kit. Upon seeing Aric and Ryan's sweatshirt, I immediately realized Aric needed more than a band aid and some neosporin. Off they went to the urgent care clinic to have Aric's cut glued shut.

Aric cried briefly after it happened, but was apparently pretty tough at the doctor's office. He came home excited about how the doctor put purple glue on his face.

The next morning Aric woke up with a swollen, black eye.

He will wear band aids for the next week to keep him from touching the area and picking the glue off.

Aric 0
Shopping Cart 1

Until they meet again...

Things Heard Around Here

2011-10-01T05:47:00.004-05:00

Thank you, Scuwey.

Translation:
Kellyn has called me "Sculley" several times this past week. Where did she get that name? It's the name of the parrot from Jake and the Neverland Pirates. Yes, my daughter thinks I am this parrot:

Or maybe she thinks "Sculley" is an awesome name. Or maybe she really is just ornery.

But then why should I feel special? She's calling everyone else "Wusty".

A Summer of Growing

2011-09-30T06:38:00.000-05:00

One of my newly discovered hobbies since moving into our own home has been gardening. I was never excited about it before now. It probably had quite a bit to do with renting houses and not making the time to tend the garden. Now gardening excites me. I don't mind spending time outside pulling weeds, planting things and watching them grow and flourish. It hasn't only been the vegetable garden that has captivated me, I have spent hours in the front garden.

I planted the front garden in April and May. If you remember we started out with only a row of mums and rocks straight across the front of the house.

I worked with my dad and designed a front garden. I enjoyed digging and planting (well, not so much the actual digging) and watching the garden come to life.

I spent the summer watering, moving plants around, adding new things, mulching, weeding and tending everything. It was fun and I'm proud to say that everything is flourishing and looks quite different now.

I like looking out my front door and seeing the plants, especially the may-night salvia. It has grown lush and thick. Right now it's a haven for bumble bees.

The mums are almost in their prime. I never really liked mums, but after learning what to do with them they've kind of grown on me. I even bought two for my pots this fall and I am going to plant them in our backyard soon.

The honeysuckle vine and obelisk trellis were an end of season sale. The vine was literally just a stick with some leaves when I brought it home. The arborvitae bush by my stepping stone was also an end of season sale. It has dead leaves in it, but I'm hopeful it will come around.

I decided not to put a border in when we put in the garden this spring. Next spring one of our first projects will be to put a border in. I have to weed-eat weekly to reclaim the garden from the yard. It sends mulch flying and I still think the grass is slowly winning. I'm a little undecided what kind of border I want and have not been in a huge rush this year to install one.

It's more evident here that the yard is winning, or maybe the plants are just too big now for the space I originally dug out.

I like the way the garden flows around to help hide the ugly retaining wall.

My barberry bushes are already quite a bit bigger and taking some of the focus away from the retaining wall.

One of my favorite things in the garden is the way the sedum has grown to fill the crevice between the rock and the wall, tying the rock into the garden.

One of Aric's favorite parts of the garden is the rock. He loves standing on it and jumping off. And, no, I don't make him wear a bike helmet to do that.

39 Months of Cloth Diapering

2011-09-29T05:29:00.001-05:00

I have spent 39 months as a cloth-diapering mommy. We're not some weird, tree-hugging family (not saying that tree-huggers are weird). We're quite normal. We recycle, we plant trees, we just don't usually hug them. However, we made the decision to cloth diaper Aric after plenty of research and discussions with other friends who cloth diapered their children. Our decisions to cloth diaper were based on two reasons: the first being that we lived out in the country with no trash service and, the second, because we really didn't have much money at that time.

Since we had no trash service in the country we had to sort through our trash, recycle and burn what was leftover. Disposable diapers aren't recyclable and they don't burn. We also had no intention to start trash service. We didn't have the money for the luxury or the desire to drag our trash down a quarter mile driveway for pickup.

In addition, we were overwhelmed by the sheer amount of money that is spent to diaper a baby. It was better for us to spend more money up front to establish a supply of cloth diapers and covers than to spend a seemingly endless amount of money over time buying disposable diapers.

We believed in our decisions and were determined to keep at it. After Aric's umbilical cord fell off we began cloth diapering and never looked back. I'm not saying that no disposable diaper ever touched his bottom, but the majority of the time he wore a cloth diaper. I used the Mother-Ease system and LOVED them. They worked well for us. (Note: I'm not endorsing any product, just saying what we chose. They may not work for everyone.)

When Kellyn was born I ordered another dozen diapers to help cover an additional bottom and three Sandy's diapers for Aric and his larger bladder to wear overnight. We cloth diapered two kids while they were at home. It's not glamorous, but it did save us quite a bit of money over time. Neither Ryan nor I have regretted our decision to cloth diaper the kids.

Fast forward to 38 months of cloth diapering; Aric is potty-trained and wearing Pull-ups overnight, while Kellyn is now using Aric's Sandy's diapers. Kellyn began waking up every night in the middle of the night. She was crying and wandering around the house. One night I decided that maybe she was drenched and uncomfortable and decided to put her in a disposable diaper overnight rather than a cloth diaper. It worked and she started sleeping peacefully through the night again.

Fast forward to 39 months of cloth diapering; Aric is still potty-trained and wearing Pull-ups overnight, while Kellyn is using cloth diapers during the day and a disposable overnight. Ryan and I were becoming increasingly frustrated that anytime we changed Kellyn's cloth diaper it was drenched and we had to change the soggy cover too. Yes, our diapers were well used, but they should have held more liquid than what they were, especially since I was adding liners to help absorb more liquid. Then I thought about it and realized that Kellyn likes to have a drink. All day long she either has a sippy cup of juice, water or milk close at hand. Which means she has quite a bit of liquid that needs to come back out. With a toddler size bladder, she can hold more and her diapers were slowly losing the battle.

Kellyn is getting close to potty training, but not quite there. When I become more mobile I intend to work with her and try to potty train her. (Potty training with crutches doesn't seem like a great idea.) In the meantime, Ryan and I had a discussion and decided that maybe we were done with cloth diapering and would just switch to disposables for our sakes and for Kellyn's. The other day we stopped and I'm okay with that. 39 months is a nice long run and we both feel we got our money's worth out of those diapers. (I'm just sorry for my mom, because we made that decision near the end of her visit rather than at the beginning of it.) Don't worry about those diapers. They will be boxed up and passed along to a newborn who will get some good use out of them.

Would I do it all again? Most certainly. It was a good experience, saved us money, and wasn't the hassle that we thought it would be.

Things Heard Around Here

2011-09-28T05:37:00.001-05:00

Kellyn: I got a boat. (Said as she climbs into a laundry basket.)

Ryan: That's not a boat.

Kellyn: It's a Wusty boat.

Translation:
Rusty is a family friend and honorary grandpa to Aric and Kellyn. He has frequently entertained the kids by pushing them around in laundry baskets and plastic bins while singing "Row, Row, Row Your Boat". Kellyn adores him and has taken to calling anyone she loves and adores "Wusty". Some day she'll figure out every one's names.

Do Not Text and Clean

2011-09-27T06:51:00.001-05:00

The following is a warning for the good of humanity: Do not text while cleaning the bathroom and taking only enough time to remove one glove to text a silly photo to a friend.

If you do not heed this warning the following might happen to you, and I will not accept responsibility for your actions:

Me (thinking I'm sending a text to my friend, who loves sharks):
It's a bad picture, but do you see the shark rising out of the bucket?

Response: New phone, who's this?

That is when the sinking feeling began as I realized my phone had not sent it to the correct person, but to the first person on my contact list. Thankfully she found the whole situation humorous and we chatted for awhile. I did manage to resend it to the correct person, who had quite a laugh over my blunder.

And this is what bored housewives do all day long...

You've Come a Long Way

2011-09-26T08:51:00.000-05:00

When we first bought our house we didn't realize how bad our kitchen was. We had been living in an old, dark farmhouse and anything was a step up from where we had been. I knew the first thing I wanted gone were the peach walls. We, eventually, wanted to rip out the old vinyl and replace it with ceramic tile and change the layout a bit but we figured we were years down the road from that ever happening. After painting the kitchen and living in the house I realized how truly disgusting our kitchen was. The previous owners must have fried everything. The cabinets, walls, appliances, light fixtures, you name it were coated in a layer of grease; grease that would require an army to remove.

God provided some immediate renovations in the form of a flood from a frozen pipe. While it was a nuisance and a month of upheaval, we were able to install a new ceramic tile floor for a fraction of what it would have cost us. Some of the cabinets were water damaged causing all of them to be ripped out and replaced allowing us to change the layout of our kitchen a bit to increase the functionality.

I loved the new, clean cabinets, but realized how imperfect our kitchen walls were. There were huge gaps filled with caulk along the top edge of the countertop backsplash. I began looking for tile for a kitchen backsplash. I wanted it to compliment our cabinets, countertop and paint color, but still remain neutral enough that when we decided to sell our house it wouldn't be difficult for someone else to change out the color theme of the kitchen. I found a perfect, easy to install backsplash.

After installing the backsplash, I had wanted to install hardware on the cabinets. I found $150 worth of satin nickel knobs and pulls for $35. Sadly, after bringing them all home I realized that our cabinet doors weren't quite even and the knobs would make them noticeably uneven. I decided we could live without the hardware and returned it all.

The kitchen is finished. It is more than I envisioned we would ever have and I am truly pleased with the results. It looks spectacular, is not covered in grease and functions much better than I ever dreamed it would. It makes me smile when I enter it and happy to cook dinner for my family.

Kitchen before:

Kitchen after fresh paint:

Kitchen after renovations:

Kitchen with tile backsplash, new blinds, and a new table:

Bookmobile Failure

2011-09-24T09:30:00.003-05:00

One of the kid's favorite activities is going to the library bookmobile on Wednesday nights. It parks at a nearby grocery store and after dinner we take the kids to pick out movies and books. Aric is always excited to climb aboard the bus and pick out items for the week.

This past Wednesday my mom and I took Aric and Kellyn to the bookmobile after dinner. For some reason I wasn't paying attention as I was picking out books for the kids. It wasn't until later that night that I read the title of one of the books we brought home:

I remember picking up the book, seeing the word "zoo", and opening the book to make sure it was short enough to hold their attention spans. I, apparently, didn't read the title or notice the rear ends when I was flipping through the book. I need to find better criteria for picking out books; criteria that includes actually reading them.

In case you have wondered, I have read the book to Aric several times. He hasn't noticed that the book is about heinies, but he has asked if he can go to the zoo everytime I've read it to him.

Seeds

2011-09-21T06:50:00.002-05:00

I've had a few inquiries about what seeds the kids and I planted in the garden. I thought since I wasn't going on any exotic ~~or not so exotic~~ trips anytime soon I would try planting some fall crops in our vegetable garden. The kids and I went to a local nursery and purchased packets of seeds. We planted broccoli, peas, mixed lettuce and spinach.

I'm not sure how fruitful our crops will be, regardless it entertains me the kids. We still have assorted peppers and tomatoes that are producing. I've frozen bags of peppers for later use hoping they freeze well. I'm also hoping that I will still get an opportunity to can tomatoes. There is a large amount of green tomatoes on our plants. It would be nice if they ripen in the cooling temperatures.

Remember the 7000 columbine seeds I planted? They didn't grow this summer. When I returned from my brother's wedding I brought back some plants my parents gave me. I planted those in the area where I had scattered the seeds in the spring. Apparently churning the soil did something to activate those seeds. I now have ~~7000~~ columbines growing.

Hopefully our neighbors like columbines.

Growing Too Fast

2011-09-20T05:26:00.000-05:00

Some days I wonder where did the time go? When did my little boy go from this:

To this:

Aric has had terrible seperation anxiety since he was about seven months old. It didn't matter that I dropped him off at the same daycare with the same caretaker and the same kids, he still cried every morning. As a mother, those tears were heart-wrenching. Nothing I did made it any better and Aric usually had to be restrained when I left him. Don't even bring up Sunday School. At the church we were attending that was worse because it meant he had different teachers and no sense of continuity.

With me now staying home, Aric has been better about getting dropped off at Sunday School. Last week he was moved out of the nursery into a new class of three year olds. We had a long talk about how he was a big boy now and would go to the big boy class instead of being with the babies. I anticipated some problems. When I took Aric to the class he held my hand tighter as we entered the classroom. One of the teachers came over and offered her hand as she explained to Aric that the other kids were playing with dirt and water. He took her hand and never looked back.

This week, Ryan and I took Aric to class. He was excited to show Daddy the pictures of Jesus on the wall in the hallway and where his new class was. Once we came to his room, Aric waved "bye" to us as he excitedly went into class. As a mother it was great to see his confidence, but heart-wrenching in a much different way. It brought visions of a future kindergartner to mind.

I am not ready for him to grow up!

Things Heard Around Here

2011-09-18T05:43:00.002-05:00

No cheese!

Said when she doesn't want her picture taken.

Apple Pie in a Jar

2011-09-17T06:10:00.001-05:00

Yesterday, while waiting for Ryan to fly back from a business trip, I decided to entertain myself by making a pie in a jar from this recipe. I thought the concept was brilliant. Why not have single serving pie in a jar just waiting in the freezer for those times when you really crave a piece of pie?

The kids were entertained, I had some apples that I needed to use, and plenty of time so I began working on my recipe.

Entertained kid #1

Entertained kid #2

I cheated and used refrigerated pie crust because I HATE making pie crust from scratch. I deeply dislike rolling pins. I also used regular half pint jars that I purchased cheaply from Wal-Mart. I didn't see the point of buying special, expensive wide mouth jars for an experiment.

Looking good already and fairly easy to assemble:

I used pie cutters that I bought from Target, not the ones they recommended from Williams and Sonoma:

Ready to be frozen:

I made seven jars and froze six of them. The last jar I saved to eat after the kids went to bed. I popped the jar in the oven and set the timer for the recommended length of time. I went on my merry little way mopping the floor while I waited, all the while forgetting that my oven runs hot. Yes, my oven runs hot and I burnt my pie in a jar. Or at least attempted to make the crispiest crust ever. The filling was still good, but I scooped out the pie crust into the trash and then dished myself up my usual bowl of ice cream. I'm not saying it's a bad recipe. I'm just saying 45 minutes was a bit too long.

Nesting

2011-09-16T07:40:00.000-05:00

This last week I have been nesting. No, this isn't nesting because we're expecting a child, it's nesting because I'm having knee surgery in a week. I know I'll be laid up for awhile and it seems like the time to get things done. My mom, thankfully, is coming to help out while I have surgery since chasing my kids while on crutches seems a little unrealistic. The week after my mom leaves Ryan's parents are coming for a visit, which is why I feel the need to get things done now while I can still move around.

I have spent the week touching up the paint in the kitchen, deep-cleaning the living room. I also replaced the flapper in a leaky toilet, planted seeds in the garden with the kids, straightened things up in the garage, installed a shelf in Aric's room, painted our front door a blackberry color and cleaned out our deep freeze. Yesterday I went on a massive grocery shopping trip to make sure our deep-freeze and pantry are well stocked for a while. I also changed the light bulb in our TV (yeah, I'm quite proud of myself, but we really do need to get a new TV before that $300 bulb burns out again).

The shelf in Aric's room:

I want to hang his name above his bed, but can't seem to find the right letters. I did find some last week that I liked, but, alas, they were missing the R and I.

The finished kitchen:

What better way to showcase our dishes and decorate our kitchen than to display them as part of the kitchen decor? I'm pleased with the results and my $12 plate rack.

The blackberry door. It's purple, but not in-your-face-purple. It goes well with our white house and grey trim. Go State! Thanks Pam for letting me borrow your idea.

I've had knee surgery before and didn't feel the overwhelming need to get things done. I think this time is different because I have more responsibilities now that I am a mother. Hopefully I will heal quickly and all of this is just a bit of overkill, but I'm prepared either way.

Things Heard Around Here

2011-09-10T06:27:00.000-05:00

I took the kids to Sam's Club yesterday morning. When we got to the front sliding doors, Aric made a beeline straight to the trash can to throw something away. I continued through the doors with Kellyn to get a shopping cart. (Before you think I'm a horrible parent, I should mention we were about three feet away.) I put Kellyn in the cart and turned to reach for Aric when I noticed him standing outside of the door with his back to me frantically looking around. I called his name, he turned around, and a visible look of relief crossed his face when he saw me. That's when he said:

I thought I was lost.

The Gnome Whisperer

2011-09-09T05:48:00.001-05:00

My brother, Ryan, used to tell us that gnomes were slowly invading. I think gnomes are using the little ones, Kellyn in particular, to assist with their invasion.

I frequently find her hunkered down, talking to and touching the gnomes. Whenever I get close she gets up and walks away. Coincidence? I think not.

Things Heard Around Here

2011-09-08T06:46:00.000-05:00

Scene: Kids are sitting at the table finishing their dinner, I am at the sink washing dishes, and Ryan has just left the room to get something. Kellyn begins to cry "Daddy" when he leaves.

Aric: It's okay, Kellyn, daddy will be back. You stay with me.

I'm glad that Aric feels protective of his sister. The whole time, though, I was thinking, "What am I chopped liver? I'm standing right here."

Shoe Lover

2011-09-07T05:38:00.000-05:00

Kellyn loves shoes. Be forewarned if you come to our house and take off your shoes, Kellyn will probably put them on sometime during the visit and wear them around the house. All shoes are fair game. This summer in Minnesota at our family picnic, Kellyn was happy as a clam in the entry way trying on the wide assortment of shoes left behind.

Oh yeah, and her love for hats is still going strong.

Labor Day

2011-09-06T06:49:00.000-05:00

Yesterday we labored more than expected. It started out as a seemingly innocuous day. We ~~slept in~~ woke up at the normal time by our two walking, talking alarm clocks. Decided that we would head to Best Buy, return home to mow the grass and later on grill out for dinner. This is what happened:

*Before leaving for Best Buy I ask Ryan if we can go to Lowe's to get a specific light bulb that I needed and look to see if they had one kind of plant on sale. He says yes. (The downfall of the day).

*Head to Lowe's, where we wander around looking at fireplaces, snow blowers, light bulbs, tile, plants and, of course, riding lawn mowers (the kid's favorite part of any shopping trip to a home improvement store).

*I buy, said light bulbs, three plants, and saw a tile for our backsplash that I kind of liked.

*We go to Best Buy where Ryan sells back some video games while I sit on the floor in front of a gaming system letting Aric crash a car repeatedly. He asks for help, which I am unable to provide because I don't game. When Ryan is finished we wander around Best Buy and leave.

*We go home. After measuring how big of a backsplash we have, Ryan sends me out to Home Depot. Ryan mows.

*I go to Home Depot don't see anything I like and then return to Lowe's. This time I have my color samples and decide I really like the backsplash.

*I return home, kids are eating, Ryan is mowing. I decide to weed eat and then work on putting the plants I bought into the garden.

*After the kids finish lunch we decide to head back to Lowe's and get the tile. (thankfully Lowe's is only minutes away).

*We buy the tile. Kids are satisfied because they "rode" tractors again.

*Return home, put the kids down for nap time. We head out to plant the new plants. We head back in. Ryan goes downstairs to play a new video game. I open a box of tile just to check it out.

*Go downstairs to ask Ryan to come up to answer one quick question.

*Spend the rest of the night installing and grouting tile. Ryan never returns to his game after my "quick" question. Ryan heads out with kids to pick up McDonald's for dinner because the kitchen is a mess.

*Did I mention I spent Friday evening and Saturday morning deep cleaning the kitchen? Yeah, we like to do things backwards.

There is still another wall left to do, some touch up grouting, caulk and seal, and then put everything back and deep clean again. Hopefully we will get it finished this week.

More than a Glimpse, Part 1

2011-09-03T07:19:00.001-05:00

Note: This is more than a small glimpse into my life, but I wanted to share this in the event that it might give someone else courage to seek help.

Eight weeks ago I summoned the courage to make a doctor's appointment. It was a difficult day. I felt like I was back in school with that sick feeling in the bottom of my stomach, that feeling when you know you are about to take and fail a test. I went anyway, because I knew I needed to go. It was worth the risk of being called crazy. It was worth the risk of having people look down on me. I needed to save myself and my family.

You see, I have known something wasn't right with me for well over a year, maybe longer. My brother died unexpectedly, my husband started a job that took him away for half of the first year, we moved to a new house in January for a fresh start, I quit my job and was staying home to raise my two young children. I had always wanted to be a stay at home mom. Now I was, but I was miserable and nothing I could do would change that. It was starting to affect me. I had crazy, irrational thoughts that I couldn't not think about, even though some rational part of my brain was telling me they were irrational. I believed I was being a horrible wife and mother. The guilt was overwhelming. I have always been told I was a patient person, but I didn't have an ounce of patience left for anyone. I am ashamed to say, but I yelled at my kids about anything and everything. Anytime they did the smallest thing I flew off the handle and yelled at them. My thoughts of guilt were overwhelming- "What must the neighbors think?", "Would my kids grow up remembering me as the mom that yelled?", "What does my husband think?", "Why can't I stop?". It got to the point where Kellyn would flinch anytime I spoke to her. As a mom, that is sobering. I was taking care of the kid's basic needs, I was taking care of the house, but I wasn't available.

Ryan has to travel often for his job. I couldn't handle the times when he was gone. It seemed like a cycle; every time he left I would break down right before he came home. We would talk about it, argue about it and tell each other we were tired of it. I felt like everyone was patting me on the head and telling me it would get better with time; I would get used to the changes in our life. I knew things weren't getting better and I was getting tired of getting patted on the head. (It was the thought that they were patting me on the head, I don't think anyone actually did that.)

People normally tell me that I am a logical person with lots of common sense. I tell you that, because my thinking had become so skewed. If I had a particularly hard day (lots of yelling and guilt) I would grab a beer or two to take the edge off. I am not a big drinker. Normally I might have one if we grill out for dinner, but that’s the extent of my alcohol consumption. I actually had thoughts that maybe I should become an alcoholic, which would solve my problems. I had thoughts that maybe things would be better for everyone if I was dead. That small, still rational part of my brain knew that neither choice was an option. I knew that I should pray and read my bible more, but I couldn’t concentrate long enough to do either and didn’t know where to start if I could concentrate long enough.

I was ashamed of myself as a mother, a wife and a person. Somewhere along the way I realized that this was something much deeper than grief over my brother unexpectedly dying. I wasn’t handling anything in life. After one of our monthly arguments over my not handling life, something clicked. Maybe it was realizing that Kellyn was flinching when I spoke to her, maybe it was realizing that I was thinking about death entirely too much, or maybe it was just time. I’m not sure what changed but I realized that I needed help and that it was up to me to get it. I had been waiting for someone to swoop in and take care of everything for me, but no one was. I needed to take the initiative and seek the help I needed.

It was hard. I did lots of research and decided maybe I was depressed. I had a misconception that my parents and brother disapproved of depression and the treatment of it (they don’t). Regardless of what I believed about their opinions I knew I needed help. I set out with a plan to find someone with a godly background to talk to and to ask the doctor about taking anti-depressants. I knew anti-depressants would be a band-aid on everything and I needed to actually work through my problems. I was overwhelmed with trying to find someone to talk to. Thankfully, through a friend, God provided a godly woman to talk to. I met with her first before I made the doctor’s appointment. She gave me the courage to call the doctor and make the appointment.

That doctor’s appointment was difficult. It was hard sharing things with the nurse and then again with the doctor. I felt like I was forever marking myself with the word “depression”. The doctor did not condemn me or sentence me to a life of depression. She told me that she thought, with the timing of everything, that I have postpartum depression and prescribed an anti-depressant for me. That concept was hard to wrap my mind around, Kellyn is almost two. I always thought postpartum depression happened right after you had the baby.

I was told to take the pill that night and that I wouldn’t notice any results until about two weeks after starting the medication. The next morning I woke up and the world was a different place. I had an infinite amount of patience. I didn’t raise my voice once with the kids. That first week I didn’t do any house work beyond cooking dinner. The kids and I played. We laughed, giggled, wrestled on the floor, chased each other around and enjoyed our days together. Ryan noticed the difference, too. He said I seemed happier, a bit more like myself. I was able to think clearly, to read my bible, to pray again. The bizarre thoughts that had filled my head were gone. For the first time in too long of a time to remember, I felt like me.

To be continued…

Psalm 3:3- “But you are a shield around me, O Lord: you bestow glory on me and lift up my head.”

Like Brother, Like Sister

2011-09-02T05:39:00.001-05:00

Remember this photo?

It still makes me giggle when I see it. Someday it will be great to use in his senior yearbook or to show his future bride.

His sister is following suit:

She, however, must realize the ramifications of this, because she was not too happy once she discovered her photo was being taken.

Things Heard Around Here

2011-09-01T05:41:00.002-05:00

Get your cheese out of your shoe.

Yes, my daughter likes to put food in her shoe and then eat from it like it's her own handy snack bowl. When we were staying at my parent's house we discovered her eating strawberries from her shoe. What doesn't kill us only makes us stronger, right?

Blech, I know where those shoes have been.

Haircut

2011-08-31T05:35:00.014-05:00

During the past week Aric has asked to have his hair cut. When asked how he wanted it cut, he first said, "just like daddy's", then later on he said "just like mommy's". Personally, I think Aric wanted a sucker, which is a reward at the end of the visit.

We don't want our kids to think we are forcing them to have their hair a certain way. So, yesterday I took Aric to have his hair cut.

He thinks it was a successful trip since he was given a soccer ball sucker at the end of the visit. I'm just happy that his hair wasn't cut like daddy's or mommy's. Next time, though, I might just buy him a sucker instead.

Aric the Shark

2011-08-30T05:33:00.001-05:00

I'm Aric the Shark...

...and I get rocks for Kellyn.

That's what land sharks do. Apparently.

Random Things

2011-08-29T05:38:00.003-05:00

One day last week I stopped for a moment and noticed the random things that were lying around my house. Random things in random places where they don't really belong.

A frog book left on the couch. It's a particularly eye-opening frog book that teaches kids that frogs eat talking flies in a rather abrupt way.

Shoes kicked off in the middle of the floor. I must have been distracted because I don't normally kick my shoes off just anywhere.

Kellyn's shoes kicked off before she climbed into her highchair.

A ping pong ball underneath my kitchen cabinets.

Bedding waiting to be washed and put on the new bed.

A mixing bowl in my bedroom. Aric told me his stomach hurt, in anticipation of anything that might happen I gave him a mixing bowl. He didn't want it, but Kellyn gladly claimed it, filled it with things and eventually discarded it in my bedroom.

Dresses from the wedding heaped on the floor. I have yet to find a dry cleaner in town and drop them off.

A beloved tractor brought downstairs to show a beloved person who watched the kids for me last week.

A painting done by my grandmother that needs to be hung up.

A fairy princess dress waiting for a young girl to feel like a princess again.

Christmas in August

2011-08-28T06:29:00.000-05:00

This Christmas Ryan and I decided that our gift to each other would be a king size bed. Ryan has wanted one for a long time and I would have to agree with his decision. We frequently find one or more kids sneaking in during the wee hours of the morning to sleep in bed with us. A queen size bed was quickly becoming too small. Neither Ryan nor I felt that we needed to be banished to one of the kid's twin beds in search of a restful night.

Last weekend we drove to Nebraska Furniture Mart and found a bed and mattress. They were delivered yesterday morning. While the bed now takes up most of the room, Ryan and I are excited about having more room to spread out and sleep.

What happened to our queen bed? Well, we moved that down to our guest bedroom. All we had down there was a queen-size air mattress and I hated making guests sleep on it. Last weekend I finally got around to painting the guest bedroom and turned it into more than just the junk room that it was quickly becoming. I am pretty pleased with the results and look forward to having guests.

Before:

After:

The Crown Royal quilt and Kansas State wall hanging were made by Ryan's grandmother. We used the quilt on our bed during the first few years of our marriage.

We like that the room is spacious and there are defined areas we can designate for the office and bed.

We had planned on painting the accent wall purple and have a Kansas State theme in the guest room. The beige paint was used because I still have so much leftover from the living area downstairs. I still have another full gallon and a half left, but I'm quickly running out of things to paint.

Things Heard Around Here

2011-08-27T07:29:00.000-05:00

I get stew-ull.

Translation: I need a stool because I just discovered Mommy is cutting up strawberries and I want some.

Still Dressing Up

2011-08-26T05:16:00.000-05:00

Kellyn's affinity for dressing up hasn't diminished yet, especially since she was given a Tinkerbell dress and sparkly heels by Papa and Nana.

It's not a good idea to leave home without your wings.

Or your heels.

Of course an old Army hat and a bathrobe work well, too, when you get tired of being a fairy princess.

A hat and a purse are always necessary for trips to the park.

You never know when the weather might change and you need the hat to protect your face.

And Mommy's kimono is always a good fall back outfit.

My Aunt

2011-08-25T05:11:00.009-05:00

This beautiful lady is my aunt Jill. She and I have always shared a special bond. My mom was pregnant with me when she was Jill's maid of honor. I was born on Jill's birthday. Every year we race to see who can call first and wish the other a happy birthday. Coming full circle, Jill was my maid of honor when I got married.

Jill is the kind of aunt who lavished us with her time and creativity. One of my favorite memories is when Jill made Ryan and I a hospital tent out of sheets in her backyard. She used strips of old sheets for bandages. Then she poured ketchup on her arm and came out to have us bandage her up.

She showers the same amount of time and creativity on my children. We stayed with her and my uncle Glenn while we were in Minnesota this summer. Jill made the kids an extravagant cardboard house (I'm sorry I didn't take pictures of it) and a butcher paper road for Aric's cars (we still have and use the road). The kids lapped up all of the extra attention.

Jill had no problem calling out my brother, Rudy, when I told her I was a bit perturbed that he ignored me at the wedding. She went right up to him and told him he needed to give me some of his time. If not for her I would've let him ignore me and then yelled at him later.

Jill and Glenn helped Ryan and I chase Aric and Kellyn around the boat. I'm sure they (Jill and Glenn not Aric and Kellyn) were worn out at the end of the evening.

With three stories of boat and two precocious kids it was a lot of work and we were thankful to have the extra help.

Jill will always hold a special place in my heart. I am thankful to have her in my life.